Pig's Ramblings: Love After 7 Years

Well, sadly, there are no fun weekend shenanigans to report.  Sandy stole our weekend passes so there was no time for MonkeyHubby and Pig.  It made for a bad mood to say the least.  I spent the mass majority of my weekend hermitted up in my room reading.  And thinking.  Mainly reading, but my brain never seems to stop causing trouble for itself.  And, as we approach November 25th which will be 7 years of MonkeyHubby and I being together, I wondered what love is after 7 years in the making.  So needless to say, I asked MonkeyHubby, just like I ask/tell him every random thought that comes through my head, to see what his thoughts were.  His response was just the romance I needed to hear on a gloomy weekend.  For him, our love feels like walking hand in hand with Old Man HB, playing footsies all night long, holding hands different than anyone else because it's our special way, and spending all day Sundays in bed just hanging out with each other.  It definitely made me smile from ear to ear, and feel all warm on the inside.  Truly must be what love feels like.  But of course, my brain didn't stop there, it wondered, since all of those things are things you feel when you're together, how we feel our love in our current separation.  I've been thinking on that one and it's a toughie.  The separation just is what it is, and trust me, while we just do what we have to each day, it does wear on you.  You miss each other, you lose touch on certain aspects, and that can rub you wrong sometimes, but you push through.  So what little things still make us feel that love even with the miles between us?! Twisting my wedding band around my ring finger feeling the weight of it and it's commitment, snuggling my nose in my stuffed monkey when I crawl in bed at night knowing he's cuddled up to my pillow back home, and running my fingers across the Texas flag that he moved from his own rigger's belt to mine after his tour in Afghanistan.  The little things that remind me we're always connected because we always want to be.  To me, that's what love feels like 7 years later.  There may not be any butterflies anymore, but there also aren't any fears.  There may not be as many electrical sparks, but there aren't any doubts.  There may not be as much unknown to explore, but there is more comfort than anything else in this world.  And I wouldn't give it up for the world.

Pig's Ramblings

Congratulations SPC Johnson!  You poured your heart out on the field this week and are officially an Expert Infantryman, I'm quite proud of you! On another note, Sandy has poured rain and misery all over our weekend, which, we no longer are getting together.  Thanks C Co for seemingly being the only company who revoked our phase 5's for the 'bad weather' this weekend.  Fabulous of you, no doubt.

Pouring with sarcasm...

Pig's Ramblings

I have officially complete my first pass request form in hopes of spending a WHOLE night with my MonkeyHubby this weekend!  Of course, it's all pending on tomorrow morning's PT test, as well as my reclass, but that should be no biggy whatsoever.
I was lucky to have a very good friend give me a call last night and check on me, on a day, after a weekend, that I really needed it.  Jud's a sweetie, full of good reminders during rough moments.  Not to mention he has the cutest new baby!  And, he's headed to another promotion board soon, time to send some extra good juju his way!

MonkeyHubby is working on getting his EIB (Expert Infantry Badge) this week, so far he's passed his PT test, day land nav, night land nav, and his first lane.  He's gonna do awesome and rock it the rest of the week so that he'll have some new bling for his uniform soon!

Pig's Ramblings

I read a lot this weekend.  And napped a lot this weekend.  And watched quite a bit of Netflix this weekend.  It was fantabulous.  I really wished for nothing more than to be alone in peace and quiet this weekend, and I got about as close to that as I can get living in barracks, so I'll call that a success.  I also was reminded why you never use glitter nail polish...it's hard as heck to take off!  Oh, I also learned that apparently 40 minutes still isn't enough time for toenail polish to completely dry.  Boo having to put boots back on all the time...I miss flip-flops.  Happy end to the weekend folks...hope your Mondays aren't too bad!

Pig's Ramblings

I've been reading a lot lately.  It's the only thing that keeps me feeling like my brain isn't just turning to complete mush while I wait to get re-classed and start up school/classes again.  When I first got back to Fort Lee a few weeks ago, I really, really did not want to be here.  So I consequently immersed myself in some Laurell K. Hamilton style escapism.  But, having finished off the two books I had of hers, I picked up a newbie yesterday that I randomly grabbed on paperback sometime this past summer. I made it about 50 pages in yesterday and so far I'm intrigued.  It jumps back and forth between a modern day PI and 16th century Christopher Marlowe.  I love books that have more than one 'story' going on at the same time so I think I'll like this one.  The front of the book claims that if you liked The Da Vinci Code that you'll love The Intelligencer, I guess we'll just have to see!

Three Thoughts on Thursday

1.  Have you ever had that moment where you've been disrespected enough that you just decide to stop trying to like someone?  Been there, done that, recently in fact.  And then, the worst part, is that once you've made that decision everything that person does starts to annoy the holy-shizz out of you.  Time to run away and hide.
2. 8 more days until MonkeyHubby comes to visit again!
3. Prayer should be like everyday conversation.  Why are we so often made to feel like it should be some sort of formal interaction?  It shouldn't, it should be like talking to your best battle.  Shoot some shizz, cover the serious stuff, vent, let it go, and feel the love on your way out.

Pig's Ramblings

Dear MonkeyHubby, Thank you so much for coming to visit this weekend!! It was amazing to hug your neck and kiss your face.  I love that you will make the 3+ hour drive, sending pictures of your solo-shenanigans along the way, just to see me for 24 hours or so.  Can't wait til next time, and hopefully then I'll be phase 5 and we can have an overnight cuddlefest!
Dear BBQ Trailer, Man, you're pretty darn good.  Way better than DFAC food, not too expensive, and your macncheese is FAB.
Dear Real Sheets & TAMU Blankie, You make sleeping in a boring old barracks room with other people slightly less crappy.
Dear Young'uns, There are a lot of y'all around here, and y'all are really starting to frustrate me.  I'm not a child, and I'm tired of being treated like one thanks to y'all.  Please grow up and realize that the Army is a full-time job, a commitment, that requires actual work on your part.  It's not college, you're not paying them, they're paying you, get it right.
Dear Friends, Family, Want-to-be-Friends, and Acquaintances, If you don't already know this about me, then shame on you, but I'll enlighten you a bit anyways, respect is a big deal to me.  I would much rather be respected than liked, or loved, or cherished, or anything really for that matter.  And consequently I hate when people disrespect me, are rude to me, snap at me when it's unnecessary and uncalled for.  Now, I understand if you're having a bad day, or something has gone wrong that is affecting your mental capabilities. But if not, learn some fucking self-control, and be humble enough to lay down an apology when it's the right thing to do.

Thanks and gig'em,

Three Thoughts on Thursday

1. Dear chocolatey, creamy Oreos, you are the sweetest of contraband temptations.  I keep a box of you in my nightstand and steal a couple for snacks during the day.  Hush!  Don't tell anyone our secret!
2.  I think the Little Rascal's had it right, girls are icky.  Army girls seem to be a special brand of icky, too.  There is so much gossip, so much lying, so much backstabbing, so much fakeness.  It's a hellish place to try and make real, true friendships.  Especially for folks like myself.  Believe it or not, being a blogger and all, I'm actually quite the private person.  I don't open up easily, mainly because I just don't trust people.  Not enough people have ever really proven themselves trustworthy, so I just stick with my natural pessimism and assume most people are selfish jackasses.  (Excuse my beautiful french language, it just comes so naturally.)  But our generation just isn't making that great of a name for themselves when it comes to relationships.  Either way, I was reminded recently why I don't open up to a majority of people, and why the people who are close to me, are close to me because they loved me enough to put in years of 'getting to know you' time.  Yes, that's right, years.  And by God, talk to those people, and they will tell you I am one of the most dedicated, most loving, most selfless, most loyal friends you'll ever meet.  But talk to people who think they can get to know me in a few weeks, or a few months, and they'll tell you I'm a cold asshole.  Too many relationships these days are built upon convenience and lies, and the "What can I get out of this?" phenomenon sweeping our nation.  Well, as far as I'm concerned, I'm happy to go back into my little cubby hole and pray, anxiously, to make it back home to real friends and family, as soon as absolutely possible.  Just my opinion...take it or leave it.
3. It's hard to try and reorganize your perspective on life, but so many times it's necessary.  (Apparently, I'm not the only blogger pondering perspective this week either...check out THIS beautiful lady's thoughts as well.)  The past couple of weeks that I've been back from my medical leave, I've spent a lot of time feeling sorry for myself and my situation.  Wondering why on earth this serious of an injury, this life-limiting of an injury, happened to someone so active and athletic as myself.  Contemplating why so much of what I love doing would be taken away from me for so long (still being told it'll be 6 months before I can run again, sigh).  And on top of it all, this morning my sergeant made me privy to the information that they've started "Fit For Duty" paperwork on me.  What this means, is they are requesting a full medical examination to see whether or not I'm fit to stay in the Army.  All of this crap piled together, and I'm one bummed pig, thinking way too much, and way too hard, on the worries and anxieties that all this brings.  Now, I haven't quite figured out how to 100% change my perspective, but I'm trying.  Trying to look for signs and symbols that there is a bigger reason, a real purpose, for the situation I'm in, and the currently craptastic path I'm walking...or hobbling, if I may.  Hopefully my follow-up doctor's appointment next Monday, after an amazing weekend with MonkeyHubby, will bring the necessary revitalization to my current perspective.  Prayers lifted!

Well, well, now that that's all off my chest, I think it's time for a feel-better oreo!

Weekend Recap

So this weekend was a four-day weekend for us Army folk.  Of course, it would've been a million times better if MonkeyHubby and I would've gotten to spend it together, but it still wasn't that bad for either of us.  MonkeyHubby had my Dad visiting so they did the whole gun range, gun show, gun shopping thing.  He also managed to half-pass out while Ogie rubbed his head after a few beers one night.  As for myself, I hung out with my battles Calhoun and Hullinger.  We painted our toes the most awesome mint green color with polka dots, we went walking at the track (less than 14 minute mile is right on track for the walking PT test I hope to be taking in less than two weeks), and petted the little kitty that was huddled up under our breezeway staying warm this weekend.  But the highlight of the weekend?!  A very long Skype date with MonkeyHubby.  He makes the goofiest of faces, as seen above, but they make me smile so big.  How was y'all's long weekends?

Pig's Ramblings

Dear MonkeyHubby, I love your smile, it warms my heart, seriously, it does, not trying to be uber-mushy or anything.  Our goofiness tonight reminded how much it sucks to go a couple weeks without seeing your face.  I mean, you kinda need to shave that mexi-stash that's coming in, but you're still my hottie.
Dear Skype, Please make a shortcut for taking snapshots during video.  Thanks and Gig'em!
Dear Shower, Please turn off.  Your knob just spins and spins and spins and spins while the freezing cold water, since you have refused to heat up for weeks, keeps running and running and running.  The CQ sergeant already dislikes my ass today and I'd really like not to have to go tell him we broke you.  Mmk?!
Dear Treadmill @ the Gym, I am coming to visit you tomorrow.  I hope to walk 2 miles without much pain or discomfort.  The first time I visited you this past week it wasn't too bad.  I was a bit sore the following day, but that's to be expected.  Hopefully this time will only be better.

Here's to our 'homemade' noise machine we'll be falling asleep to tonight... O:)

Three Thoughts on Thursday

1. Bomb suits are really heavy, and really stinky.  Cleaning them is not fun, but not the worst detail in the world.
2. After my first day back on the treadmill yesterday, my hip is hurting today.  Boo!  I think I may need to buy a hot pad to carry around with me and sit on all the time.
3. Looking forward to four whole days of 'sleeping in' this weekend.  Thank you Columbus for discovering the promised land, and thank you Army for making every little holiday a long weekend.  I'll miss you Monkey...next weekend!

Respite Recap

Well, I've been a bad blogger and haven't visited for a couple weeks, but I've good reason, promise!!  Yup, that's right, Monkey finally came home.  WHOOP!

We got to spend a good four days together just hanging out, eating good food, shopping, and enjoying every bit of each other that we could.  Every bit!

Unfortunately, it didn't last forever and back to Ft. Lee I returned.  MAJOR sigh.  But, I have learned a few things about my injury.  One of my two stress fractures has healed like 90% of the way, whoop!  However, the other "stress fracture", as it was in the middle of basic the last time it was scanned, apparently turned into a true break and is still just that, totally broke.  I've even made a nice little illustration for you!

Ain't that just grand?!  Anyways, my major brokenness should actually allow me to start moving forward with re-classing to a new Army job within the next month or so.  The doctor will place me on what they call a permanent profile and I'll get, most likely, a desk job.  Not too shabby, it will allow me to get healthy and will keep me in the Army.  All good things, all things that Monkey and I were hoping for.  I may be able to run again in 6 months or so...